13 card poker game A recent advisory from the United States Surgeon General has made it clear — parents and caregivers are burned out. In a 2023 poll of more than 3,100 American parents, nearly 50 per cent reported experiencing debilitating levels of stress most days. Other recent surveys from Canada and the U.S. also found between 20 to 30 per cent of parents are experiencing moderate to severe levels of anxiety that could warrant a clinical diagnosis. When the tasks of the holidays are piled onto this baseline stress, it’s easy to see how the “season of joy” may feel more like the “season of overwhelm.” How can both our society as a whole and parents as individuals dial back the pressure? Structural changes are essential. But scientific insights about child development can also help parents prioritize what matters most and shift how they respond to things that may otherwise trigger anxiety. What’s causing parent stress? Much of what is making parents stressed these days is structural in nature: things are more expensive, it’s hard to find affordable child care, parents are more isolated, work is taking up more of parents’ time and children’s engagement with ever-evolving technology brings a range of serious health and safety concerns . These factors disproportionately affect parents who experience poverty, racism, violence or trauma. Addressing them will require substantial political and cultural shifts . But there are smaller factors to tackle as well. Parents today have more access to information than ever before. It’s not just a pediatrician or family member they can turn to for advice, but endless blogs, forums and social media platforms. While online sources can build community and confidence, they can also contribute to information overload as panic headlines and contradictory advice often compound parents’ feelings of anxiety and being overwhelmed. These platforms also tend to showcase idyllic situations that lead parents to create unhelpful comparisons and unrealistic expectations, contributing to feelings of shame and guilt . To counteract these feelings, it’s helpful to remember a few things: children’s development is influenced by many things parents can’t control, there are many benefits to imperfect parenting and independent play and parent wellness matters more than most else. 1. It’s more than just parenting It’s common for people who haven’t experienced discrimination or unexpected challenges to attribute children’s behaviours and outcomes to parents’ choices and efforts. This is an example of “attribution bias,” a bias towards a particular kind of explanation . Developmental science helps dispel this bias by highlighting that children’s development is influenced by many factors other than parenting and beyond parents’ control. First among these is genetics. For example, twin studies have found that genetic factors explain 57-76 per cent of child/adolescent mental illness, 60-84 per cent of picky eating and 60-85 per cent of school achievement. Another is exposure to adverse or positive experiences , such as witnessing violence or being supported by friends and non-parental adults. These types of experiences have substantial effects on children’s physical and mental health. But they are inequitably distributed, based on factors such as income and race . There are big differences in children’s temperaments and how they respond to their environments . The same parenting strategy applied to two different children can lead to two very different outcomes, as you may have observed in siblings. This is why the next time you catch yourself feeling shame or judgment about a child’s behaviour, it’s important to remember parenting choices might not be to blame. 2. Parental imperfections are opportunities Psychologists and pediatricians often recommend certain parenting strategies to support children’s development. But rarely do these providers suggest parents must follow their advice 100 per cent of the time to achieve the desired effects. It’s what happens most of the time that matters. Even when parenting “imperfections” happen, like breaking routines or uncharacteristically snapping at children, they can be seen as opportunities. When “rupture” is followed up by “repair” in the form of acknowledgement, apologies, explanations and/or moments for restoring connection, it can benefit the parent-child attachment relationship and help children build their emotion-regulation skills. By using repair after the overwhelming moments that often happen during the holidays, parents can transform these moments from sources of shame to reasons for pride. 3. Benefits of independent play Over the past few decades, parents’ worries about children’s physical safety have grown , while children’s unsupervised play time has declined . Many parents are spending more time with their children , hovering or helicoptering over them rather than promoting independent play. No doubt, playing with the support of a responsive adult has many benefits for children’s learning and development . But when it comes to parent involvement in play, sometimes less is more. Research shows that unstructured play — play that isn’t organized by adults and doesn’t have defined goals — is a “ fundamental necessity ” for children’s well-being. Outdoor risky play has enormous benefits for children’s physical and mental health that outweigh many of the perceived safety risks. There are also many unique benefits of playing with peers for both academic and social skill development. With this in mind, if you are a parent who is regularly your child’s main playmate, it may be time to seek more opportunities to take a step back. The holidays can be a great time to start. 4. Parent well-being is paramount News and social media feeds are full of panic headlines that can make it seem that certain foods, toys or parenting habits are what make or break children’s life outcomes. It’s easy for parents consuming this media to feel anxious or even want to change their purchases or behaviours in response to every new study. But most headlines overstate the findings of weak studies or small effects. And if following the headlines comes at the cost of parental well-being, it could be doing more harm than good. This is because one of the most consistent and strongest predictors of children’s well-being is having safe, stable and nurturing relationships with caregivers — as both the Canadian and American Pediatric Societies have stated. Children need present and responsive caregivers more than they need any specific foods, presents or new parenting fads. This is why it may be worth considering what you can do to support yourself or other parents’ well-being this year. This could mean providing practical or social support to the parents around you or just making them feel heard and understood . With high parental stress , it’s more important than ever for everyone to replace judgment with empathy and advice with real support. And for parents, let’s try to distinguish what we can and can’t control, practise self-forgiveness in tough times, allow ourselves moments to do less and focus in on what matters most. It might help us experience more moments of joy in this holiday season and through all the seasons of parenthood. Nina Sokolovic has worked in several roles at non-profit and government organizations that support the well-being of children and parents, including her current as a Senior Policy Analyst in the Ontario Public Service. She previously received funding for her research from the Social Sciences and Humanities Research Council of Canada.My partner won’t listen when I tell him I don’t like it when he shoves a hand up my skirt

NEW ORLEANS (AP) — A scruffy little fugitive is on the lam again in New Orleans, gaining fame as he outwits a tenacious band of citizens armed with night-vision binoculars, nets and a tranquilizer rifle. Scrim, a 17-pound mutt that's mostly terrier, has become a folk hero, inspiring tattoos, t-shirts and even a ballad as he eludes capture from the posse of volunteers. And like any antihero, Scrim has a backstory: Rescued from semi-feral life at a trailer park and adopted from a shelter, the dog broke loose in April and scurried around the city until he was cornered in October and brought to a new home. Weeks later, he'd had enough. Scrim leaped out of a second-story window, a desperate act recorded in a now-viral video. Since then, despite a stream of daily sightings, he's roamed free. The dog’s fans include Myra and Steve Foster, who wrote “Ode to Scrim” to the tune of Ricky Nelson’s 1961 hit, “I’m a Travelin’ Man.” Leading the recapture effort is Michelle Cheramie, a 55-year-old former information technology professional. She lost everything — home, car, possessions — in Hurricane Katrina in 2005, and in the aftermath, found her calling rescuing pets. “I was like, ‘This is what I should be doing,’” Cheramie said. “I was born to rescue.” She launched Zeus’ Rescues, a nonprofit shelter that now averages 600 cat and dog adoptions a year and offers free pet food to anyone who needs it. She helped Scrim find the home he first escaped from. It was Cheramie's window Scrim leaped from in November. She's resumed her relentless mission since then, posting flyers on telephone poles and logging social media updates on his reported whereabouts. She's invested thousands of dollars on wildlife cameras, thermal sensors and other gear. She took a course offered by the San Diego Zoo on the finer points of tranquilizing animals. And she's developed a network of volunteers — the kind of neighbors who are willing to grid-search a city at 3 a.m. People like writer David W. Brown, who manages a crowd-sourced Google Map of all known Scrim sightings. He says the search has galvanized residents from all walks of life to come together. As they search for Scrim, they hand out supplies to people in need. "Being a member of the community is seeing problems and doing what you can to make life a little better for the people around here and the animals around you," Brown said. And neighbors like Tammy Murray, who had to close her furniture store and lost her father to Parkinson's Disease. This search, she says, got her mojo back. “Literally, for months, I’ve done nothing but hunt this dog,” said Murray, 53. “I feel like Wile E. Coyote on a daily basis with him.” Murray drives the Zeus' Rescues' van towards reported Scrim sightings. She also handles a tactical net launcher, which looks like an oversized flashlight and once misfired, shattering the van's window as Scrim sped away. After realizing Scrim had come to recognize the sound of the van's diesel engine, Murray switched to a Vespa scooter, for stealth. Near-misses have been tantalizing. The search party spotted Scrim napping beneath an elevated house, and wrapped construction netting around the perimeter, but an over-eager volunteer broke ranks and dashed forward, leaving an opening Scrim slipped through. Scrim's repeated escapades have prompted near-daily local media coverage and a devoted online following. Cheramie can relate. “We’re all running from something or to something. He's doing that too,” she said. Cheramie's team dreams of placing the pooch in a safe and loving environment. But a social media chorus growing under the hashtag #FreeScrim has other ideas — they say the runaway should be allowed a life of self-determination. The animal rescue volunteers consider that misguided. “The streets of New Orleans are not the place for a dog to be free,” Cheramie said. “It’s too dangerous.” Scrim was a mess when Cheramie briefly recaptured him in October, with matted fur, missing teeth and a tattered ear. His trembling body was scraped and bruised, and punctured by multiple projectiles. A vet removed one, but decided against operating to take out a possible bullet. The dog initially appeared content indoors, sitting in Cheramie's lap or napping beside her bed. Then while she was out one day, Scrim chewed through a mesh screen, dropped 13 feet to the ground and squeezed through a gap in the fence, trotting away. Murray said Cheramie's four cats probably spooked him. “I wholeheartedly believe the gangster-ass cats were messing with him,” Murray said. Cheramie thinks they may have gotten territorial. Devastated but undeterred, the pair is reassessing where Scrim might fit best — maybe a secure animal sanctuary with big outdoor spaces where other dogs can keep him company. Somewhere, Murray says, “where he can just breathe and be." Brook is a corps member for The Associated Press/Report for America Statehouse News Initiative. Report for America is a nonprofit national service program that places journalists in local newsrooms to report on undercovered issues. Follow Brook on the social platform X: @jack_brook96TD Bank Says Earnings Growth ‘Challenging’ Amid AML RemediationLuke Humphries bid for back-to-back World Championship titles on track after win

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A dryer and a washer are also available in the ward. KUCHING (Nov 23): The Sarawak Children’s Cancer Society (SCCS) have funded RM50,390 for upgrades to the facilities at the Paediatric Oncology Ward at Sarawak General Hospital since March this year. This follows a thorough inspection as well as discussions with the medical team to identify the needs to enhance the ward’s conditions and improve the overall treatment experience for young cancer patients. According to SCCS, Ward 2A at the Paediatric Oncology Ward serves as the central treatment hub for children under 18 diagnosed with cancer from across Sarawak. The ward typically accommodates 15 to 20 patients under active treatment, with capacity reaching up to 28 at peak times. “SCCS is deeply committed to supporting Sarawak’s children with cancer, not only through medical and financial aid but also by creating a comfortable, supportive environment within the treatment space. “We believe a positive atmosphere that benefits the child, their caregivers and the dedicated medical staff, contributing to a holistic healing journey,” said SCCS president Mary Kiu in a statement yesterday. Among the upgrades are a washer and a dryer, each valued at RM5,500; a water purifier worth RM4,500; four units of water heaters worth RM4,890; and five air conditioners with a combined value of RM30,000. A water purifier is added to provide better facilities for the children with cancer and their caregivers. These improvements follow previous investments by SCCS in 2023, of which over RM86,000 funded three new air purifying units for Ward 2A; renovations to enhance the waiting area at the Paediatric Daycare in Bintulu General Hospital; as well as providing flooring replacement in Sibu Hospital’s Paediatric Ward and Isolation Rooms, meant to significantly reduce infection risks. As a non-profit organisation, SCCS incurs annual expenses of approximately RM2 million, with 50 to 60 per cent of its funding derived from public donations and corporate social responsibility (CSR) partnerships. SCCS also offers essential support services such as financial assistance for families, accommodation, meals, transport, counselling, recreational activities and care packages, meant to assist new patients in adjusting to life in the ward. Since 2001, SCCS has provided vital support to over 1,700 families across Sarawak, thanks to the community’s generosity and corporate collaborations. Businesses or organisations interested in CSR partnerships are invited to connect with SCCS on 011-39276553 or email via [email protected] . For more information, visit https://sccs.org.my.Trump names former Sen. David Perdue of Georgia to be ambassador to China

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